Motherhood

May is bike month.

Riding a bike is fun. It requires some skill, but with practice and time you can get good at it.

May is also Mother's Day.

Being a mom is also fun. It requires some skill, but due to the unpredictability and volatility of half the parties involved (namely--kids) you can practice and take time and still not feel like you're good at it.

When I've heard moms talk about how being a mom is hard, I imagined they were talking about the dishes, laundry, grocery shopping, meal planning/making, changing diapers, running errands, paying bills, and--oh yeah--taking care of the kids, too. That's not what I find hard. Most of the time, what's hard for me is being bored. I'm busy, yes, but I'm bored. Being a mom takes a lot of mental strength that I never knew I didn't have. Not strength for when there are major trials--surgery, moving, illnesses. Most moms are able to step up to the plate when those things come around, which they always inevitably do. I mean strength for the down time. For the HOURS of the day where the little guys want entertainment. For answering "why?" for the bazillioneth time today. For when you haven't had enough adult conversation. For when you are asked to read that one book...AGAIN. To be able to listen to that CD of primary songs on repeat. For having to share a bite of anything you try to eat, no matter how sneaky you try to be. For not being able to read a book, go to the bathroom, play the piano, or do anything without a little sidekick or curious eyes staring at you.

Being a mom is hard.

When people like to ride bikes they might ride every day, or even go on a 100 mile ride. But then they get off their bike and do something else. No matter how much they love cycling, at some point they stop riding. I think I could use some practical, actually possible ways to get off my mom bike. I love being a mom. I chose it. I'll choose it again. But it's nice and necessary to stop sometimes. I need to refill my mental strength.

Some of my thoughts for moms:

If your 2-year old doesn't eat his dinner...or his breakfast the next day...or the yogurt you gave him for snack after that... it's okay.
You can take a break without having to "deserve" it.
It's okay if you want to be helicopter parent your child sometimes.
There is no justification needed if you want to take a nap.
It's okay for your home to be messy sometimes--even if it's simply messy because you don't want to clean it, and not just because you're too busy to clean it.
There's no need to "Excuse my ______" in every picture you post of your life.
Who says you "should"?
You don't "just" anything.
You're doing a good job.